The Love of My Life Pt2

Blog Post#11.                                               Edita was being pursued by many eligible men which made me quite insecure. I decided then that I would ask for a commitment. We’ve been seeing and talking for a while but the relationship had not been formalized. I didn’t want to rush her so I gave her ample time to think and pray about us being together. After all, Christians should include this matter in their prayers.  Some months later when I felt that she had enough time to ponder and she had been comfortable around me, I thought that she would be ready to give me a verbal response. I prepared for that moment .

One day, I invited her to see a stage play I was doing in CLSU. She came early that day but did not stay to watch the play. “I couldn’t stay too late because my parents will look for me and there’s no more bus late in the night.” She said. “I just came here to support and wish you well.” Her thoughtfulness toward her parents and to me was very admirable. Imagine, an adult woman going home early at night in respect and honor of her parents. What a noble gesture! For that, I gave a perfect ten in her score card.  That reflected her good character and sincerity to a relationship. What a good daughter! She would be a perfect mate.” I want her to be my wife!” This I decided in my heart!

I invited her for a walk and showed her some interesting spots in CLSU’s sprawling campus. I took her to the old mango orchard by the main gate. The huge mango trees were teeming with fruits. Some of the fruits had fallen to the ground but they were still good. I was ready to share with her a fun experience so, armed with a pocket knife I peeled and cut the fruits and I produced some rock salt from my pocket for a dip. “Wow”, she exclaimed. “You are really ready for this!” I held my head and chin up to brag on my readiness. “Of course!” I answered. “I know girls like to eat green mangoes”.  It was sheer fun having the girl I admire by my side doing fun things with me. But I had to remind myself: “It’s not official yet until you heard a positive word from her and now is the perfect time. Go ahead Gil, and seal the deal.”

We walked to the lagoon right by the main gate and in front of the infirmary. We sat at the bench facing the pond teeming with lively colored koi fish. Then I delivered my dialogue. “Edith, we’ve been going out for sometime now, I love you and I want to know what’s your feelings toward me”. I looked her straight in the eye. Do you love me too? I asked. I stopped talking having said my piece. I waited for her to respond and after a brief silence, she first gave a decisive nod followed by saying: “Yes, Gil, I love you too!”

Joy immediately flooded my whole being. I had to express and release the surge of emotion. I wanted to hug and kiss her but I controlled myself. First of all, we were in a public place, secondly, I want to show my respect for her by keeping my hands off her. We both know the moral ethics we Christians must observe with regards to dating. And not to forget, we were both youth leaders in our church who were expected to set good examples. But my elevated emotion simply needed a release. I stood up raising my two hands, facing the pond, I let out a loud whisper. “She said she loves me too!”–I said to the koi fish in the  pond swimming gleefully as if celebrating with me! When I sat back down beside her, she gave me a pinch (kurot) on the side of my abdomen which was her signature response whenever I acted silly.

I enjoyed it whenever she pinched me. For me it was an act of intimacy, an expression of familiarity that conveyed a message of  affection. It gave me a dose of electric surge attesting to my physical attraction to her. Then I gently took her hand and clasped it in mine–tight and very intense.  I was surprised she relented. Her soft velvety hands holding mine was a  wonderful experience.  I looked at our clutched hands.  How different and yet how gorgeous they were together! Hers was smooth and fine, made even more beautiful with her finger nails painted in soft pink. Mine was rough, hairy, rugged and popping with veins. In them, I saw a man and woman coming together forming a beautiful and strong alliance.  For the first time I felt like a real grownup man.  We held hands rather very briefly. I gently kissed the back of her hand before releasing it, and we just sat there staring at each other. As we looked at each other tears of joy welled down our eyes. We were both in cloud nine! I broke down the silence by announcing: “I’m hungry, let’s eat.” As we stood up from the bench, I took a hankerchief from my pocket and gently wiped her tears and mine.

The walk to the student cafeteria was one of the most memorable moment of our courtship. It was a march of victory! It was a celebration parade! I felt very proud to be seen walking with the girl of my dream–now my girlfriend. Every once in a while, I would lean close to her and whisper “I love you.”  And she would respond with a nod and a sweet smile. We were two young people very much in love. I thought of Pastor Fernandez who played Cupid in this love affair. I’m sure he would be happy to hear that his effort had a positive result.

Edita and I dated for five years. We had a lot of time to get to know each other. And each day our love for each other grew. Like any relationship, we had our share of troubles.  And resolving those big and small differences served as valuable practice for our future life together. In 1982, when both of us were already professionals enjoying our jobs as engineers, she had an opportunity to travel to the United States. Along with other church young people, she was invited to attend an international gathering called Urbana ’82 in Illinois, USA. When she asked me if I will let her go I said “I will not get in your way to the US.”

But deep in my mind, I had a big apprehension as she told me earlier that her uncle in California wanted her to bring her credentials because it would be very easy for her to get a job in the US. My heart sank and all hopes regarding the two of us started to fade away thinking that we might not see each other again should she decide to stay in the US and heed her uncle’s advise. Edita had a very impressive employment record. Being employed as a structural engineer by MIESCOR, a MERALCO subsidiary, she was one of the engineers who designed the first segment of Light Railway Transit (LRT -Balintawak to Baclaran).

After that prestigious project, she was transferred to Bataan to be part of a team working on the design of the nuclear power plant project in Morong. In addition to these, she lectured on the subjects steel and concrete designs, mathematics, chemistry on the college level. She was also invited to conduct review classes for civil engineering board exams. Working only for few years, she already had significant accomplishments in her profession. A job in America as an engineer would be the next level to pursue and I had no doubt she was capable of doing. For me I thought that to stop her from going to America would probably anger her family and may blame me for losing a rare opportunity. I grieved silently and even cried many nights with the thoughts of losing the love of my life. The day came when the missionary Paul Turner accompanied the select group of young people for visa interview at the US embassy. They asked us to pray for our youth ambassadors but I didn’t know what to pray for because I was very confused.

Later, I heard the news that all the young people who were interviewed passed and were given US visas. I started to mourn. I skipped meals. I cried. Since then, I did not want to go home to Cabanatuan as I used to every weekend to see her. I busied myself with my job. Until one day I received a radio message from her through our farm office. She wanted me to meet her in Manila because she wants to share her good news. “Her good news was bad news for me.” I told myself.

We met at Shoe Mart mall at the Araneta center. She was beaming with the biggest smile I’ve ever seen on her face. And with that, I could not control my tears. I wore shades to conceal my eyes swollen from crying the night before. “Now she will say goodbye.” I don’t know how to prepare for that moment. Then we met. She was even more beautiful that day. Looking so fresh and elegant in her stylish dress and with a huge beaming smile. My heart jumped seeing her again after so many weeks. I didn’t realize how much I missed her.

“Look what I got”! She said excitedly showing me a brand new camera she just bought. “Now, she’s really getting ready for her American tour.” I told myself. “Congratulations,” I said , trying to show a happy face. “Congratulations, for my new camera?” She asked . “Congratulations for getting a US visa.” I answered. “No! I don’t have a US visa.” She said smiling. “You’re confusing me, I thought everyone got it?” “Yes, everyone who went to the interview passed, but I decided not to go to the interview.” “What? Why? ” She looked at me intently with a grin, her beautiful eyes smiling as well.  She held my arm and started talking with a serious tone, just like what she used to do when emphasizing an important lesson when teaching Sunday school.  I immediately read her cue and so I listened attentively.  “I don’t want to go to the US without you.”  I paused for a moment trying to understand what she just said. I looked at her eyes with wonderment, then she nodded again.  I finally got it and I did not know how to react. The next thing I knew, I pulled her toward me and gave her the biggest hug. Laughing and crying at the same time, I said “Thank you!” repeatedly.  This time I don’t care if we were in public. This occasion called for it. I held her tight and she embraced me too… Both of us in tears! Again I asked “Why?” And she emphatically answered: “Because I chose us.” I embraced her even tighter saying “I love you!”  “I love you too!” She responded. I felt the sincerity in her words. She made a choice and she chose me!  I was the happiest man in the universe. “You will not regret choosing me.” I promised her. And she answered with these prophetic words. “Someday I’ll see America, you and me and our family!” Now she’s talking about family. This girl was ready to marry me. I saw it in her eyes. I felt it with her embrace. I heard it in her voice. And I was more than ready to propose a marriage.

“Are you hungry?” She asked. “Very much!”I answered. As we walked to the food court I put my arms around her shoulders and I guided her hand around my waist. I felt it when she held my body tight as we walked. We did this for the first time and it felt so good. At the food court, I ordered the best food I could see, and for drinks…what else but my favorite Mountain Dew. Now, for the first time while enjoying our meal, I brought the idea of marriage. Her eyes lit up and so did mine!

Stay tuned for the “One of a Kind Wedding” in the next issue of myJOURNEY.